⁌ ULY ⁍added a comment 2 года назад
Alexander, you seem like a smart guy. Why would you ask a roomful of Russians learning English to correct your composition. Have I told you about Journaly?
Go to Questions & Answers
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a note 2 года назад
note (ru-en)
Помогите, пожалуйста, улучшить, дополнить или подправить текст 🤔
New Technologies and the Quality of Life
Hello, everyone! Now I’m going to dwell on the thing that is closely connected with my generation. My day-to-day life goes hand in hand with new technologies since I was born in the era of innovations, the era of digitization. Needless to say, that though the majority of the modern teenagers take all that staff for granted, I, for one, find all these advancements extremely captivating and crucial in terms of quality of life. Nevertheless, is it actually that beneficial? Is it the gem of our modern world or the curse that eventually may lead to some dreadful repercussions?
Well, on the one hand, no one is able to deny that technology has changed the way people live their everyday lives. To begin with, various means available for everyone to communicate have emerged. Exchanging information used to take days, weeks, or even months. Thanks to technology progress, such a thing is not a problem anymore.
Moreover, the healthcare industry strived to the top, to the peak and fortunately, gone are the days of long lines in the outpatient wards and hours of waiting as long as you can schedule a hospital visit using your mobile phone.
Furthermore, technology in a broad sense has brought an unprecedented way of curing and fighting a great number of deadly diseases that had wiped off the terrifying number of human lives. Technologies literally help us live longer, much longer and much safer.
Over and above that, it seems also essential to emphasize that searching for specific information is not about loads of hours you should spend sitting in a library. Just grab your phone and go surf the net!
Last but not least, I’m positive that technology enhancements have provided us with an enormous number of opportunities for learning. Undoubtedly, everybody has heard of so-called self-made role models who do not have a diploma. Indeed, there are many examples of people that managed to succeed on the basis of their own solely education. The worldwide web consists of everything we may need today. Eagerness and appetite for flourishing, the appetite for prosperity… these are the links of one chain.
However, I’ve suffered some unpleasant consequences using all these technological benefits and profits. Unsurprisingly, the pace of life has already increased enough to make us more anxious. Social media, everlasting stream of information, images, chats, and absolutely random things make a significant contribution to the harmful stage of our mental health. Hence, so-called “social media detox” is the only thing you may take up to endure all that stuff after all.
Having taken everything into consideration, I reckon that technology has the two sides of the coin. Era of digitization and technology advancements have improved our lives whereas sometimes it may have rather devastating effects on us. All in all, as a medical student, I’d be glad to finish my speech with a well-known Paracelsus quote: “All things are poisons. It is simply the dose that distinguishes between a poison and a remedy.” That’s why, make using technologies a remedy, a wonderful remedy that imbues and completes your life.
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Discussion (26)
Holy Molyadded a comment 2 года назад
Exactly! 👍
Holy Molyadded a comment 2 года назад
One thing I can tell you though. Your text is overloaded with introductory words. Why so many? You start every paragraph with a new one. Looks like you’re eager to show how many of them you know. People don’t speak/write like that.
Holy Molyadded a comment 2 года назад
Oh and did you mean “stuff”?
Holy Molyadded a comment 2 года назад
Okay, one more thing: “dwell on” doesn’t really work here. It doesn’t mean what you think it does. It means being obsessed with something and think/talk about it all the time. Like to think/talk about something for hours driving yourself and those around you crazy.
Here you just want to “TALK about something that’s closely connected TO my generation”.
⁌ ULY ⁍added a comment 2 года назад
Olga, your observations and edits are very impressive! I think I underestimated “the room”.
Holy Molyadded a comment 2 года назад
Awww thank you hun❤️
Оксана Гайadded a comment 2 года назад
Приветствую Александра! 🌹
Культурный он человек. Суп сварю и обязательно вернусь к этой статье, чтобы высказать своё дилетантское мнение.
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
Yeah, Uly, you have)
Just on the verge of posting it on Journaly)
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
Thanks a lot, Holy Moly, everything’s fixed. Surely, that was “stuff” 😎💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻
Yup, I was eager to show how many of introductory words I know since it’s the speech for the third Olympiad tour, so… 😌
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
Приветствую, Оксана, давайте)
⁌ ULY ⁍added a comment 2 года назад
Alex, “Surely” doesn’t mean “of course” or “definitely” — it means “I should hope…” when you make a supposition:
[Looking at two women with your friend - one of them, his wife]
Friend: That woman is a tarantula. If you don’t give her what she wants, she’ll make your life a yoghurt.
You: Surely you don’t mean your wife!
Friend: No, the one next to her. She’s my brother’s ex.
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
Аххаах какой кошмар, Uly, я понял) Danke schön 🥰🥰🥰
Оксана Гайadded a comment 2 года назад
Главное - русский текст! Посредственный текст, может быть на английском он будет звучать хорошо?
Подправить русский текст не реальная задача.
Проверить английский текст на предмет ошибок могут наши переводчики, но это огромная работа! Так что нужно обходиться теми технологиями, который нам даёт интернет.
Я покажу как это делать: ........
Оксана Гайadded a comment 2 года назад
Не уместилось всё. Теперь сравниваем английский текст в статье и в Гугл-переводчике. Видно, что есть расхождения!
Я предлагаю скопировать текст из Гугл-переводчика!
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
В чем прикол, Оксана?
Holy Molyadded a comment 2 года назад
Александр, прикол в том, что цель «Оксаны», судя по всему, навредить как можно большему количеству людей, изучающих английский, откинув их своими методами и приёмами как можно дальше от настоящего языка, от правильного произношения, правильной грамматики и правильного понимания всех процессов английского. Человек выбрал себе в жизни миссию и, надо отдать должное, упорно ей следует.
Оксана Гайadded a comment 2 года назад
Holy Moly, уважаемая! Я писала, что выскажу дилетантское мнение, которому не обязательно следовать!
Оксана Гайadded a comment 2 года назад
Александр! В интернете можно найти массу статей по нужному профилю. Заняться частичным плагиатом, написать толковую статью на русском языке и перевести ее при помощи Гугл-переводчика!
Призовое место, где-то, будет обеспечено! Хочешь жить - умей вертеться! Успеха 🌹.
Holy Molyadded a comment 2 года назад
Человек, который на полном серьёзе советует переводить статьи при помощи Гугл-переводчика никогда не выучит английский.
У Александра абсолютно нормальная статься, которая просто требует грамотной редактуры. Гугл-переводчик превратит любой нормальный текст в 💩
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
Ахахахах ну ладно, каждому свое)
Спасибо, Holy Moly, ещё раз)
Оксане — удачи 😎
⁌ ULY ⁍added a comment 2 года назад
Alex, I just corrected your post on Journaly:
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
Copy that, Uly, thank you a lot! I’ll scrutinise it morrow)
Оксана Гайadded a comment 2 года назад
👍
⁌ ULY ⁍added a comment 2 года назад
Alex, here’s a page on SURELY:
Alexander Kalinchenkoadded a comment 2 года назад
Аххаха спасибо, Ули, сейчас ознакомлюсь 😜😜😜